Bisexuality is valid!

 min read
April 14, 2022

Let’s start with a definition:


Describes a person who is attracted (sexually, physically, romantically) to people of two or more genders.

MYTH: Bisexual people are actually gay or straight.

FACT: Bisexual people aren’t “actually gay” or “actually straight.” They are actually bisexual.

MYTH: You’re not actually bisexual if you’ve only dated the ‘opposite’ gender, and you’re just gay if you’ve only dated folks of the same gender.

FACT: Previous (or current) sexual and/or dating experiences do not define a person’s sexuality. You can be in a hetero relationship and still be bi! Bisexuality is valid even when not visible in a relationship!

MYTH: Bisexual folks are just hypersexual folks who are more likely to cheat.

FACT: Being bisexual does not mean a person is any more likely to cheat or be hypersexual than people of other sexualities!

MYTH: Bisexual people are just going through a phase.

FACT: Like all sexualities, bisexuality is valid and not a phase.

MYTH: Dating a trans person makes you bisexual or pansexual.

FACT: Dating a trans person does not make you automatically any sexuality!

MYTH: Bisexuality excludes trans people whereas pansexuality does not.

FACT: Bisexuality has always included trans people. Bisexuality is the attraction to two or more genders and does not inherently exclude trans and nonbinary people.

MYTH: Bisexual people are actually just gay/straight & want attention.

FACT: Bisexuality is not a cry for attention. No one’s sexuality is for attention. People’s sexualities are just that—their sexualities!

MYTH: Men can’t be bisexual. They’re just gay.

FACT: Bisexual cis men and bisexual trans men exist! Men can absolutely be bisexual and their bisexuality is not any less valid than anyone else’s.

MYTH: Bisexual people are half gay, half straight. Bisexual people are attracted half to men and half to women, 50/50.

FACT: Not only does this belief actively erase people who are not men or women (nonbinary folks) but bisexuality is also not limited to two genders. Bisexuality is fluid, does not exist on a binary, and often looks different for everyone!

MYTH: Bisexual people aren’t straight enough or queer enough.

FACT: Bisexual people are bisexual enough! Bisexual people belong in the LGBTQ+ community just as much as any other LGBTQ+ person does. Bisexual folks experience a lot of biphobia, even from within the community, and it must stop. Gatekeeping only hurts us!

MYTH: All bisexual people want to have threesomes and orgies and are polyamorous.

FACT: Bisexual people are not a monolith. While there is nothing wrong with sexual promiscuity, threesomes, or polyamory, bisexuality does not equate to any of these things. Many bisexual folks are monogamous and do not want to engage in any of the above!

MYTH: Bisexuality is about who you have sex with.

FACT: Bisexuality is not defined by your sexual partners. This belief also disregards that the bi+ community also includes folks who are biromantic!

A few more thoughts–

  1. Straight men often fetishize bisexual women, which is not only very invasive and uncomfortable for that person, it is also invalidating of their sexuality.
  2. Trans & non-binary folks can be bisexual, too!
  3. Bisexual folks are often constantly questioned, “Are you sure you’re not gay/straight?” This is not only incredibly invalidating but it also can lead to internalized biphobia & gaslighting. Don’t ask people if they are sure about their sexualities, it’s none of your business or concern 🙂

Amazing bisexual folks & accounts to follow–

Blair Imani (she/her) -- @blairimani

Elijah Alter (he/him) -- @devine_deception

Rose Montoya (she/they) -- @rosalynnemontoya

Sky (she/they) -- @femmmeow

Ren Fernandez-Kim (she/they) -- @corpusren

Madison Werner (she/her) -- @madisonnwerner

Ilya Selyna (she/her) -- @ilyaselyn

Jesediah (he/they) -- @jezmakesmusic

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